We sent Lisa to the hospital today
By force.
Lisa, one of our Very Important Patients,
who we see monthly in our geriatric clinic.
Lisa with the five cats and the yes-no answers and the flat affect.
Lisa on Lithium.
But today, Lisa is alive, electrified,
Wide eyes roving around the room,
Ropy arms emphatic as a conductor’s
In agitation. Precision. Explanation.
Lisa has seen the Light. Big pharma
and blood pressure meds killed her boyfriend.
Now she has a new dharma.
She is
Off the meds.
So here it goes.
The tightening of the cuff, the little sigh as it exhales,
The swish of blood thrumming through arteries.
The pressure of it all – our breaths held.
Sky high.
How do you call to someone within a dream?
Ascending through pearly clouds into their world,
The thin filaments of your ladder falling away, dissolving,
As if made from gossamer.
Lisa now yelling, thrashing,
Unable to awaken from her fluorescent white nightmare.
EMS arrive, the tensile strength of their nylon straps
Daring resistance.
Amidst this unfolding scene, my thoughts diverge,
turning to you.
Your wiry gray hair and too-large clothes,
The hints of paranoia.
Your progressive seclusion, agitation.
If someone knew, would they take you away from me, too?
Your grace, my filial piety.
Your secret, safe with me.
This poem is inspired by my interaction with a patient who stopped taking her psychiatric medications and had to be sent to the hospital against her will. It reflects the emotional toll on healthcare providers to act against a patient’s wishes, even if it is in their best interests. Finally, there is a tie-in to the author’s fears for those whom they love and are affected by mental health challenges that could lead them to a similarly vulnerable position as this patient.
Image credit: Cloud Textures by Jacob Gube is licensed under CC BY 2.0.
Medical Student Contributing Writer
Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine
Aish is a fourth year medical student applying to internal medicine. She is interested in narrative medicine and women's health. In her free time, she enjoys cooking and playing board games.
